Aliens Did 9/11?

Well, how about it? Did aliens carry out the crime of the century?*

This notion would be only the beginning of a hypothesis and not a proper “conspiracy theory,” because the latter would involve only humans, to the exclusion of extraterrestrials. But as a speculative theory possibly being developed as you read this by humans in the government/media complex, it makes a certain amount of sense.

First of all, Executive Branch concoctions “explaining” to the world the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, weak from the start, have been increasingly abandoned by media boosters and the general public (both target consumers of government propaganda) alike. No amount of distraction—not Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin, Covid 19, global heating, and electric cars all put together—can stanch the run for the exits in this theater of the preposterous, even among a populace as credulous, or hypnotized, as we in the United States seem to be.

In these times, perhaps, the combined voices of The New York Times, The Epoch Times, the Times of London, In These Times, CounterPunch, The Weekly Standard and their myriad allied (controlled) outlets are not sufficient, for much longer, to keep common sense from asserting itself, even in a nation of news junkies, cell phone addicts, sports fans, arts aficionados, political “conservatives,” political “liberals” and People magazine readers.

It’s true that the terrorist operation that launched a string of wars in countries most Americans can’t find on a blank map occurred almost 20 years ago, and that that hit of hits was a hit before today’s teenage mothers were born—all of which contributes to the attitude of “it is what it is” (in any situation).

What’s 9/11? Two hits in New York (not on Broadway) and one in (greater) Washington and a crash in rural Pennsylvania, none of them generating the kind of wreckage with telltale evidence one might have expected them to.

What’s 9/11? You know, these incredible hijackers with box cutters took out the Twin Towers and put a hole in the Pentagon and … you know, incredible. Yes, incredible.

The whole thing is incredible unless aliens did it. They’re capable of anything, these extraterrestrials, depending which ones (and this is all strictly in the realm of theory) one is talking about. Increasingly in mainstream media outlets somehow believed by their readers and listeners and viewers on a variety of subjects, one can find news stories and opinion columns devoted to the possibilities.

Like THIS ONE on today’s editorial page of a regional newspaper in Western New England. The byline is that of Stephen L. Carter of Bloomberg Opinion, and here’s the headline: “The UFO report won’t change minds.” The column is worth reading, and fun, even if the author doesn’t connect to any future hypothesis that aliens did 9/11. Carter, I’m guessing, has never once questioned in print the official version of those terrorist attacks, like all such scriveners who get paid for their stuff. Just as the newspapers in which the column appears have never questioned it.

Here’s an alternate headline for this entry: “Aliens to the Rescue!” Subhead: “News World Relieved to Find New Diversion.”

— Mark Channing Miller

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* Possibly “kick off” would be a better compound transitive verb than “carry out,” because the terrorist attacks were only the start of the overall crime, which continues.